Wednesday, January 23, 2013


In 12.5 weeks Toddy and i are leaving the kids with our parents, and heading off to celebrate our 10th wedding anniversary in Thailand!  *scream yay oh my goodness* Ive never left Australia before so im very very excited to see some new sites and experience a different culture. Ive got the passport papers filled in, have had the photo taken ( I think I look like the lion form the wizard of Oz in it), and i'm off to the Post Office with it all in the morning! It's all becoming VERY real :)

Our trip has been booked for months and months and Id been meaning to lose a bit of weight before we went, you know, just 20 kilos, no big deal... ha well as always i leave everything to the last minute,  so now i have 12.5 weeks to work hard and lose as much as I can. I know that 20 kilos isn't going to happen, but every kilo counts. I dont want to feel unfit and like a beached whale while I am there. I want to feel confident and not ashamed of how I look. 

Im using My Fitness Pal and really loving it... the scales are starting to move. Im really determined and working hard, and im going to see results. I want to shock everyone ;)  While I work out I imagine myself lying by the pool at our resort, and canoeing through caves in Phang Nga Bay. This incentive really helps!

So stay tuned friends! I'll let you know the outcome. Some encouragement along the way will be awesome too.

Love Bec

Thursday, January 17, 2013

Dear Blog... a truthful moment.

Dear blog,

Im feeling very out of control of everything around me... children and house.
My children seem to be wild monsters making mess with every step they take. I feel like im constantly saying, "pick that up, don't hit, don't yell at your brother, stop running, shhhhh, put your rubbish in the bin, get back into bed (im saying that right now)..." It just goes on all day and it's hard work. We are meant to train our children, and i seriously feel like I have got nowhere. I feel that if i had somehow trained them more efficiently, then things would be so much easier now. Maybe then we would have more order and peace, instead of the constant fighting, arguing, yelling and mess. I sometimes just want to scream... AAAAGHHHHHHHHHHH... but i guess I only have myself to blame.

Train your children- It sounds so straight forward in theory, but when has raising children been straight forward. I know I need to be more consistent, set more boundaries, use positive reinforcement, set consequences, yell less (shh that's a secret between the neighbors and me), I KNOW ALL OF THIS and still I struggle. I will try harder. My resolution is to try harder and restore order and peace to the household! My children will behave, my children will turn out brilliantly.

Im sitting here typing surrounded by duplo, shoes, pillows, clothes, toys, pencils, pegs, clean washing, dirty dishes etc etc !  It is not pleasant. To clean it up almost seems like an impossible task. (it's not of course). I am lazy, I am sitting here typing and not cleaning. For me typing  or writing is my way of processing how im feeling... writing to me is liberating and it is how I come up with solutions. I don't talk, I write. Writing clears my head. The reason I am writing this blog is so that I can clear my head enough for me to be able to get to the place where i can face the mess... and also to let others, who may be fed up with the kids and mess, know that they are not alone :)

Im going to try harder to train my children so that I can get them and my house under control. Please ask me how im going from time to time. We all need encouragement, especially me.
Thanks for reading
Love Bec xox

Friday, January 11, 2013

A Sweet Sound

Im sitting here alone in my house, listening to the bang bang of Todd hammering the laundry roof outside. This is the sound of home improvements but for me it is also a sweet sound, the sound of health and a miracle.

This last week Todd has painted the eaves of our house, we've had 2 families over for  meals, he worship lead, and we spent a whole day wandering around town. This is amazing. Usually after just one of these activities his head would play up and he'd be on the couch for a day recovering. Not only this but we've just had Christmas, and traveling up North plus all the Christmas festivities would usually have him on the couch for a week recovering. It is a miracle! I haven't seen my couch so empty in years, it must be having Toddy withdrawals ;) I remember Chi's news book in Kinder, nearly every page was about daddy laying on the couch watching tv, haha, I wonder what the teacher thought!
Yesterday Todd said he is starting to feel like himself again and you have no idea how happy this makes me. I hate seeing him in pain and frustrated cos he cant do what he wants. And we now have HOPE that he may indeed be able to do what he wants, and not be trapped inside the brain injured body, that has held him prisoner for the last 4.5 years.

He really is a different person. He has been happy and joking around. I had totally forgotten what he was like. Im remembering his strange sense of humor, and getting used to it all over again :) I have laughed so much over the last couple of months, it's great!!

Im so happy but deep down im scared, scared that tomorrow or next week we will wake up and he will be sick, and things are back to how they were. I'm scared that i'll have to mourn the loss of my active, happy, joking, best friend, once again. Someone told me to just enjoy today and make the most of the healthy times, and that's what im doing!  I'm really trusting in God to continue healing him and i'm just so thankful to God for what He has done so far, it has changed our lives completely and we are feeling so, so blessed! Thankyou everyone who has been praying for us over the last 4 years, we love you. His health is a total answer to prayer, where the Doctors have no answers or solutions, God has health and Victory!!! Thankyou friends and thankyou Jesus!!!

... bang bang, i can still here that hammering... what a sweet, sweet sound.